Top 40 single reviews

Kelly Clarkson

I Do Not Hook Up

Album: All I Ever Wanted

Year: 2009


                Kelly Clarkson tries her fix her crush’s problems in the frank  “I Do Not Hook Up.”



               He offers her his drink he just bought and orders another. She shakes her head no. She tells him after the drink, she’ll drive them back home. A goofy grin spreads on his face as he takes a sip from the bottle. She gives him a playful smack on the arm and tells him that it’s not going to happen. However, something is going on between them. She’s certain he likes her. However, he won’t ask her out. He doesn’t overanalyze every gesture and inflection like she would. He thinks she sees him as a friend until she says otherwise. She thinks he should be upfront with her. But he’s not a risk-taker. The only time his adrenaline flows is when he’s nervous around her. (“Oh sweetheart, put the bottle down/You've got too much talent/I see you through those bloodshot eyes/There's a cure you've found it/Slow motion sparks/You caught that chill/Now don't deny it/But boys will be boys/Oh yes they will/They don't wanna define it/Just give up the game and get into me/If you're looking for thrills then get cold feet.”)

              In the chorus, she says she’s into serious relationships. She doesn’t want it to about sex. He’s going to have to take her dinner, get to know her friends and attend some holiday functions with the rest of her family. She tells him to be affectionate with her and let his emotions show. There are no crushes for her. She falls in love. He can continue to flirt with her. Eventually, she will ask him out. (“Oh no I do not hook up, up/I go slow/So if you want me/I don't come cheap/Keep your hand in my hand/And your heart on your sleeve/Oh no I do not hook up, up/I fall deep/'Cause the more that you try/The harder I'll fight/To say ... Goodnight.’)

She admits to not being the domestic type. The recipes posted on Facebook and then tries out usually end up burned. She orders takeout, the local restaurants knowing her by the sound of her voice. She’s says she’s nurturing and will help heal from his last relationship. She tells him not to worry. She’s going to be there for him. Their relationship may last three months or thirteen years. For now, he’s the right person for her. He’s looking for something to make him feel and each time, he comes up empty, he goes to the bar. He has to quit hiding from his demons. (“I can't cook, no, but I can clean/

Up the mess she left/Lay your head down and feel the beats/As I kiss your forehead/

This may not last/But this is now/So love the one you're with/You want a chase/But you're chasing your tail/A quick fix won't ever get you well.”)

          The chorus is sung again.

          In the bridge, she wishes he could say that he needs her. It’s all she has to know and she’ll go out with him. (“'Cause I feel the distance/Between us/Could be over/With a snap of your finger/Oh no.”)

           An extended chorus is sung. (“Oh no I do not hook up, up..the harder I'll fight/To say/'Cause the more that you try/The harder I'll fight/To say... Goodnight.”)

           At the end, she tells him to stop feeding his addiction and live his life with her. (“Oh sweetheart put the bottle down/'Cause you don't wanna miss out.”)

          Clarkson’s adamant vocals employ some tough love to try to get through to him.  He thinks he’s a lost cause and means nothing. She really loves him. But she needs him to get some therapy or attend some local AA meetings, whatever will work.

 The stark “I Do Not Hook Up” has a flirty air as it takes on a complicated subject, hiding its seriousness well.

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